How to prepare for your financial mediation

It is a positive step when you and your ex agree to mediate in order to find a solution to the division of your assets. What is the best way to prepare to ensure you each achieve what you want from the session? Mediation is very much about looking forward. You are separated. You will be divorced. It is what you do next that will pave the way to a new, happier future; as two separated, independent individuals, no longer a couple for sure, but certainly remaining dedicated co-parents of your children. It follows that the best and simplest way to prepare for your mediation is to consider what you need to move forward for you and your children to be happy in separate households.

These are the steps you can take before the mediation that will help you achieve this outcome.

1. Obtain three valuations on the family home from three local estate agents. The mean value can form the basis of discussion for the purposes of mediation.
2. Obtain an updated figure on the amount required to pay off the mortgage and be aware if there is any penalty.
3. By reference to the net equity in the house, assess the market and see what accommodation might be available to accommodate you and the children when living with you.
4. Obtain mortgage advice on your ability to raise a mortgage.
5. Review your respective incomes and outgoings and assess the differences between you in net income. Consider how this might be addressed by way of maintenance or by an unequal split of the property in favour of the party with the smaller net income.
6. Obtain the CETV (cash equivalent transfer value) of your pensions from your pension providers. These are free of charge when required for the purposes of divorce proceedings. It can take time for these to come through, so make the request at the very start of the process.
7. Work out how much it costs to meet the needs of the children over and above the basic needs met by the child maintenance service, e.g. hobbies, school activities, holidays, pocket money. Consider how these might be met jointly in the future and, depending on your net incomes and how the children will divide their time with each of you, in what proportion.
8. Obtain independent financial advice on your future capital and income needs moving forward.
9. Obtain legal advice on your best, worst, and most likely alternatives to a negotiated settlement and on costs.

In our experience, clients who work with us to take these steps both before and in between mediation sessions will feel able to explore options and find compromised solutions that will allow each party, and their children, to move forward with a sense of empowerment, positivity, dignity, and optimism for the next chapter of their lives. Maria Mediation has more information on financial mediation on our page here.