The nature of after-divorce care can be quite different from the divorce mediation sessions you may have attended during your separation, but the principles remain the same. Accredited and experienced family mediators help you to make important decisions about the future of your family, the happiness of your children (if you have any), and the responsibilities you share with your ex-partner.
What is after divorce care?
This support is available regardless of your former circumstances and our post-divorce care clients include:
We are not here to judge the circumstances of your former relationship, your separation or your current lifestyle; we are here to provide you with the support you need to move forward.
We provide the post-divorce support you need to keep a positive outlook on life after you separate from your spouse or civil partner.
That can take a variety of different forms, for example:
Separating can put a strain on family finances and individual lifestyles after divorce. We can refer you to an independent financial advisor (IFA) who can help you to manage your finances more comfortably as an individual.
This can help with day-to-day spending and bigger financial decisions, such as how to divide a shared pension pot with your ex-partner and how to invest for your future to boost your income in later life.
You’ll need somewhere to live after your divorce and, with the help of a mortgage advisor, you may be able to become a homeowner in your own right, rather than having to move into rented accommodation.
Children respond differently to their parent’s separation. Mediation helps to engage them in the divorce process itself, but the future can still seem uncertain. It can be helpful for young people to know mediators are still there to help.
We can help with emerging issues like after-divorce child custody disputes or any changes that are needed to the previously agreed conditions, such as where the child lives or how much time they spend with each parent.
If appropriate, we can also refer you to experienced, professional childcare practitioners who can provide specialist services as required to help you move forwards positively.
Co-parenting after divorce
One of the best ways to co-parent after divorce is to continue to let your child’s voice be heard on issues that directly affect them, and even on broader issues that impact the whole family.
Young people can feel torn apart by divorce, especially if both parents move out of the former family home due to financial concerns or bad memories of the place, as this can leave children trying to settle into two new homes at once. You can help your children to settle into their new surroundings by making sure both locations are ‘home’ to them.
Give your child responsibility for what belongings and clothing they keep in each location, and don’t insist that everything they take with them for a visit comes back from the same trip.
Re-breaking the ice
Any divorce redefines your relationship with one another, whether you choose to never speak again or to remain on civil or even friendly terms, and this is often influenced in part by any children you might have together.
Because this sense of change is inevitable during a separation, it is also an ideal time to renew the lines of communication so that you can move forwards positively not just during the divorce, but in the years that follow too.
Acknowledging what works well
There is nothing wrong with acknowledging the good aspects of a relationship, even at a time when you are legally separating from one another. Doing so can help to put things into perspective and focus proceedings on the negotiations that need to be made.
Divorce mediation always aims to make separation a less stressful process, but adapting to the upheaval can still be challenging and deeply upsetting. Counselling can help you to deal with any negative emotions and find your optimism again.
Many individuals see a counsellor following their divorce or civil partnership dissolution. It can be a valuable stepping stone in your journey and help to put you back in touch with your enthusiasm and excitement for what lies ahead.
One of the biggest and most unexpected impacts of separation on some people is how it affects their friendship group, especially if most of your friends are other couples or people you have only known during your relationship with your spouse or civil partner.
If separation causes these friendships to become more difficult or leaves you outside of that friendship circle, we can help you to find new interests and new people who share them, or to meet people in your area who are going through similar experiences.
Finally, life coaching can help build your confidence, identify and focus on your goals, and get your life moving forward in a specific direction.
At Marcia Mediation we have close connections with Smart Works, an organisation that helps women to re-enter the workplace if they have been out of work for a considerable length of time, by providing practical advice on everything from writing a CV to what to wear.
We can help men too – so whatever your gender and whatever the lasting impact of your relationship and separation, we are here to provide you with the support you need to set clear goals for your future and move on from your dissolution or divorce with dignity.
Why choose Marcia Mediation?
We are incredibly proud of our post-divorce care services and aim to offer significantly more than you will find available from other family mediators.
From a single after-divorce mediation session to help you take the first steps along your new path as an individual, to multiple mediator meetings and related services that help you throughout your new journey, we are here for you.
We believe that separation – whether by divorce, civil partnership dissolution or from an unmarried partner – should not leave anyone feeling isolated and alone when there are professionals ready to help and new friendships waiting to be made.
If anything, separation is the ideal opportunity to identify what you want from the next phase of your life and to go get it without being held back by the strain of a failing relationship or an unsupportive partner.
Ultimately, everyone can benefit from a second opinion and some independent advice at times, and that’s what we aim to provide, from the biggest issues like after-divorce child custody and re-entering the world of work, to the ‘small stuff’ like evening classes and interest groups.
Our caring and experienced team welcome all enquiries, so whatever part of your new life you feel uncertain about, Marcia Mediation are here to provide you with some added confidence for the future.
A pioneer for mediation since commencing legal practice as a family solicitor some seventeen years ago, Marcia has worked exclusively as an independent mediator since 2004, focussing initially on family mediation, and latterly on work place mediation.
Marcia’s accreditations include Family Mediation and she is a qualified child consultant practitioner. Her associations include the Professional Mediators Association and Resolution.