Custody Mediation Questions: What and Not to Say!

A family law mediator requires a diverse set of skills to effectively facilitate the resolution of disputes between parties involved in family law matters. Some of the key skills of a family law mediator include: 1. Communication Skills: Mediators ne...

Navigating child arrangements mediation can be an emotionally charged journey for couples facing separation or divorce. This stage holds significant implications for the future relationship with one’s children. As individuals embark on this process, questions and concerns may arise. This article is here to help, focusing on essential questions to ask a mediator during child arrangements proceedings. Whether it’s understanding the mediation process or clarifying how decisions are made, being well-prepared with thoughtful questions can empower parents in managing this challenging situation with care.

Questions to ask a mediator about child arrangements (FKA custody)? 

For most couples reading this article, this may be the first, and hopefully, last time they undergo mediation for child arrangements/ custody; therefore, it’s only natural to have some questions and concerns regarding the matter. 

Before meeting with your mediator, it’s always a good idea to have a list of questions that you would like to ask. Focus on the list you’ve created to enhance your perspective on the situation and better your chances of winning arrangements/ custody.

Bear in mind that mediation can be a tough process, and it’s not uncommon for emotions to get the best of people. Try to keep as calm as possible and gather all the information you need. If you do happen to feel overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to excuse yourself from the room for a few minutes while you gather your composure. 

Some questions you could ask your mediator include: 

  • How does the mediation process work? 
  • How long can we expect to undergo mediation? 
  • Are there any guidelines we should be aware of before we get started? 
  • How are the interests of our child prioritised during the meditation process? 
  • How are the decisions made, and what happens if we can’t agree on certain issues? 
  • How will we manage logistical details such as scheduling the sessions? 

By gaining a clear idea of the process, you can feel more empowered throughout the mediation. Clear communication between the parents and the mediator will also help foster a transparent and collaborative atmosphere in which the children’s needs are put first. 

What not to say in child arrangements (FKA Custody) mediation?

Child arrangements/ custody mediation is often a tense and sensitive process because the stakes are incredibly high. Negative outcomes could affect your relationship with your children and diminish the amount of quality time you spend with your kids. 

Acting with composure and professionalism at all times is vital if you want to improve your chances of favourable results. 

We recommend that you avoid: 

  • Negative comments about the other parent. 
  • Accusatory statements that shift all the blame onto the other parent. 
  • Using profanity or emotionally charged language. 
  • Discussing adult issues with your child present. 

What to say in child Arrangements (FKA Custody) mediation? 

Just as there are various negative behaviours you should avoid during the mediation process and at home, there are also positive actions you should embrace. Make sure to listen to both the mediator and your partner before you act. 

Here are some key guidelines to follow: 

  • Instead of dwelling on problems, focus on being solution oriented. 
  • Express a willingness to co-parent and create a supportive environment. 
  • Seek clarification rather than making assumptions. 
  • Be open to compromise and find common ground. 
  • Always keep your child’s best interests at heart. 

By gaining a clear idea of the process, you can feel more empowered throughout the mediation. Clear communication between the parents and the mediator will also help foster a transparent and collaborative atmosphere in which the children’s needs are put first. Child arrangements/ custody mediation is often a tense and sensitive process because the stakes are incredibly high. Acting with composure and professionalism at all times is vital if you want to improve your chances of favourable results. Remember, what you say and how you behave during mediation can significantly impact the outcome, so it’s crucial to approach the process with a focus on the well-being of your child.

 

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