Day Four of Family Mediation Week this year is focused around the idea of parting clouds that show the way to move on with your life and overcome the hardships of divorce and separation.
The mediation process itself offers some structure to divorce and clearly maps out the pathway so for many families this does significantly lift the pressure on families. At this stage in the process, every individual involved should feel as though they have been heard and listened to which means assets should be divided to a level of satisfaction for everyone involved and there should be a level of clarity about how the separation will work in the future.
All too often a separation can lead to a feeling of stalemate, where neither party wants to compromise at all for fear of admitting guilt, or where emotions simply run too high to see the situation from the other party’s point of view.
This is where mediation can be particularly helpful, offering a middle ground and a genuinely independent point of view, and in the worst cases, shuttle mediation can be used to facilitate communication between parties who cannot bear to be in the same room.
But aside from helping to reduce the cost, complexity and time taken by divorce proceedings, in the best outcomes mediation can help to restore communication and even to help you appreciate each other’s experience and understanding of past events.
It’s important to realise that involving children in divorce and other family law cases mean more than just asking them what they want. Mediators can also make sure that children receive continual updates about the proceedings, without legal jargon, so that they do not feel like they have been shut out.
But even after separation, mediators can continue to provide much-needed support as parents adjust to new residency arrangements and shared responsibility rather than round-the-clock co-parenting. Your responsibilities as a parent do not end with divorce, and while they do not change fundamentally either, the practicalities of being there for your child can be very different after separation.
Mediation is there for both parties and for your children too, without judgment or partisanship, but always for the mediator to share with you their expertise and experience, to calm the waters, and crucially to resolve any future disputes as they arise before they can cause undue trauma to your child.
A pioneer for mediation since commencing legal practice as a family solicitor some seventeen years ago Marcia has worked exclusively as an independent mediator since 2004, focusing initially on family mediation, and latterly on workplace mediation. Marcia’s accreditations include Family Mediation and she is a qualified child consultant practitioner. Her associations include the Professional Mediators Association and Resolution. Marcia is also a Resolution qualified Professional Practice Consultant (PPC). If you would like to resolve your separation issues through mediation please do not hesitate to contact us.